| Ugh. D; |
[Aug. 12th, 2008|04:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  apathetic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Love Will Find A Way - Lion King 2 Soundtrack | ] |
Nehhhrrr (2:02:47 PM): Dude lol I didn't even notice you logged on. D: I have something for you.
crashcarousel (2:02:53 PM): D: ?
Nehhhrrr (2:03:02 PM): I have to scanner it. >>
crashcarousel (2:03:13 PM): DDDD: SCAN FAST.
Nehhhrrr (2:04:40 PM): Are you leaving? DDD:
crashcarousel (2:04:49 PM): No but I wanna see D:
Nehhhrrr (2:04:52 PM): Oh xD;
Nehhhrrr (2:05:37 PM): I need a bigger scanner. >C
Nehhhrrr (2:08:45 PM): Looky who I drew. c:
http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o286/fayeofthenight/Picture082.jpg
crashcarousel (2:09:05 PM): AHHHH
Nehhhrrr (2:09:11 PM): o.o;
crashcarousel (2:09:12 PM): RESIGN <3333
Nehhhrrr (2:09:14 PM): x3
Nehhhrrr (2:09:37 PM): I like the flower. >>;
crashcarousel (2:09:39 PM): ilyyy ; ; <3333 He's so cute and he looks like such a pisser which is good 'cuz he is
Nehhhrrr (2:09:51 PM): xD
Nehhhrrr (2:10:27 PM): Imma color it for sure.
crashcarousel (2:10:31 PM): DO IT.
Nehhhrrr (2:10:38 PM): Ok. D:
crashcarousel (2:10:45 PM): evaerbva3
Nehhhrrr (2:10:48 PM): xD;
crashcarousel (2:11:00 PM): Just made my day. >:K
Nehhhrrr (2:11:04 PM): I need to draw more for you. >:/
crashcarousel (2:11:13 PM): I need to draw more for YOU. >.>;
Nehhhrrr (2:11:21 PM): PSH YOU ALREADY DO. D<
crashcarousel (2:11:33 PM): YOU DRAW MORE FOR ME THAN I DO FOR YOU.
Nehhhrrr (2:11:38 PM): Nu uh. D:
Nehhhrrr (2:11:52 PM): I don't think you do. >>
I love him so much. :c <3 |
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| O WTF @ HIM. D |
[Aug. 12th, 2008|08:51 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | Meh. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Metal Health (Bang Your Head) By Quiet Riot | ] |
So he texts me at like 8:22 AM telling me to get online, I get on and he's not even on. DDD<
Wttttttfffffff D;
I had a drawing for him arrggghhhhh. Dx<
K fine whatever, he'll be on later. >>
I have to paint the shed again today, I missed spots I guess. :/
I'm hungry and I feel like drawing. <<
K bye~
KaneNight281 (8:57:28 AM): Well you have a big butt so there.
Nehhhrrr (8:57:38 AM): You have a big butt face.
KaneNight281 (8:57:53 AM): oh snap you got me. =[
Nehhhrrr (8:57:57 AM): ;3
---------------------------------------------------
Nehhhrrr (9:04:08 AM): Oh and I don't listen to rap often, I hope you like classical.
KaneNight281 (9:04:22 AM): lol classical.
Nehhhrrr (9:04:29 AM): >w>
KaneNight281 (9:04:51 AM): Classical is kinda... boring >_>
Nehhhrrr (9:05:24 AM): I KNOW. THAT'S WHY I SAID THAT . <<
KaneNight281 (9:06:49 AM): How about classical rap? >.>
Nehhhrrr (9:07:08 AM): I like old school personally.
KaneNight281 (9:09:22 AM): Old school hip hop?
Nehhhrrr (9:09:27 AM): RAP. D<
KaneNight281 (9:09:34 AM): Hip hop. >_>
Nehhhrrr (9:09:39 AM): Your mom.
KaneNight281 (9:09:54 AM): No she doesn't like the hippity hoppity. <.<
KaneNight281 (9:10:50 AM): Still lol @ classical.
Nehhhrrr (9:11:38 AM): xDD; |
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| "Curl up in a ball with something hanes~ |
[Aug. 11th, 2008|02:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | :/ | ] |
| [ | music |
| | T-Shirt - Shontelle Layne | ] |
In bed I lay, with nothing but your t-shirt onnnnn~.
With nothing but your t-shirt oooooo-nnnnnnn"
Some conversation funnies with my friend Rick. c:
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
LOLLOSER
A s h says:
Thank you. c:
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
psh
A s h says:
I need a stick. D:
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
why?
A s h says:
My dad wants me to paint the shed but I need a stick to mix the paint up with.
A s h says:
AND THERE ARE NO LONG USELESS OBJECTS IN THIS HOUSE. Dx
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
I'll show you a long, useless - .... B]
...
Wait, shit, no D:
A s h says:
LOLOLOLOL
---------------------------------------------
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
oi
A s h says:
oioioioi
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
i smell bad. o-o
A s h says:
Go take a shower. xD;
Sir Satan, the Passionately Apathetic says:
FINE, WHATEVER, I WILL D<
A s h says:
Ok. o.o;
Nevermind my last entry. :/ |
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| Decision... |
[Aug. 10th, 2008|02:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  :/ | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dangerous by Akon ft. Kardinal Offishall | ] |
I really love Olly. :/
But I don't think we can be friends any more.
He will never like me the way he once did.
And it's too hard being just friends.
So in order for me to get over him, I blocked him from AIM and MSN.
I will stay away from the computer as much as I possibly can.
This will be my last day online.
I can't move on if me and him continue to talk. |
|
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 8th, 2008|01:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  :'D | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Born to Run by K-Os | ] |
Olly says:
I'd tap it.
A s h says:
furfag. D:
Olly says:
That's 'cuz you can't see it in person. >.>;;;;
Olly says:
AM NOT.
Olly says:
He doesn't have animal features in his human form. D: < So I can't be a furfag kthns.
Olly says:
*x
Olly says:
>.>
A s h says:
<<
A s h says:
-whisper- furfag. >>
Olly says:
KTHNX
A s h says:
WELCOME
A s h says:
:'D
Olly says:
-smack-
Olly says:
>:C
A s h says:
'EY D<
Olly says:
ihy
A s h says:
ihy2
Olly says:
ihym
A s h says:
ik.
Olly says:
kg
A s h says:
lul
A s h says:
lighten up loser. D<
Olly says:
NO U
A s h says:
U 1st
Olly says:
no >:C
Olly says:
ihysmrn >:C
A s h says:
xDD;
A s h says:
wily~ <3
Olly says:
fuhhufuuurr
Olly says:
-boobygrab-
A s h says:
-handsmack-
A s h says:
>>
Olly says:
-handsmack'd- ; ; -molests-
A s h says:
-flail- Dx<
Olly says:
-RAEPZ-
A s h says:
-preggo- D<
Olly says:
-is a daddy- :'D
A s h says:
lolololololollloleemWexqnzwhe |
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| Omfgomfgomfgomfgomfgiuvhbfi |
[Aug. 6th, 2008|09:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  ^-^ | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Sunday Morning by K-Os | ] |
EEEEEEEE~ >w<
He logged on today after like 2 weeks of ignoring/avoiding me. <<;;
When he logged on my heart felt it was literally going to explode in my chest.
Literally, it hurt a lot until he talked to me, and it was like he never left.
We played wajas together and talked about stuff.
Apparently, he's been working on this 7x14 oil painting.
He's getting paid $140 for it. c:
I made him make a promise that he wouldn't leave again without saying something.
He said he'd try. >>;
He also said he was watching my DA while he was gone.
I felt so happy. n.n
He also said he'd be on tomorrow. x3
I can't wait to talk to him again.
I love him so much. x.x
We get along so frickin' well.
I don't even need to try to keep a conversation going, it keeps itself going.
ilhilhilhilhilh <33333333333333333333333333333 |
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| Transgender? :/ |
[Aug. 2nd, 2008|01:07 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
So.
I am transgender.
But I don't know if I am ready to be identified as such. :/
I am not changing my physical body.
I'm very confused. :/
I hate being a girl. </3 |
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| OMFGWTFBBQ?!?! |
[Oct. 27th, 2007|01:45 pm] |
So we can't personalize our journals to our liking any more?
Unless we are a....premium member?
-.-"
</3 LJ. |
|
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| My Heart Throbs For You |
[Jan. 28th, 2007|08:06 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | <3 | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Stickwitchu" Pussy Cat Dolls | ] |
Oh god, i really wish i could be with Mac right now. I just want to be in his arms.
Last night we got in a fight but in the end we made up. We always do. And i am so happy for that.
There's not much to say... Hope all is going well with you guys.
Peace
~Ash |
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| School Skipper |
[Jan. 22nd, 2007|09:54 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | I WANT! >. | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Daddy Cool" Boney M | ] |
Not really....i'm just faking sick >.>
I start new classes today and i didn't want to go. I felt so sick. I wanted to throw up so i used that as my excuse to stay home. I'm currently regretting it. I know my aunt will come home and see that i am fine...i'll probably get bitched at for it too. I want to run away to Utah, so i can be with Mac. But we both know if i run away my parents will call the police. My parents aren't open at all. Just my mom and she lives in Tennessee so that doesn't help me at all. I wanted to go live with her but i'd have to change schools. Then i wanted to go live with my dad but he lives in Holly now so i'd still have to change schools. I hate school so much. I hate my parents too... why i couldn't i have parents like Mac's? His mom is so nice and awesome. ^-^ She's very pretty too.
I came up with a plan as to how me and him could be together this summer and my plan was to tell my aunt and dad and mom about Mac. Have them talk to his mom or him. Slowly and hopefully they would trust him. Then his mom could come pick me up and we could go back to Utah. But i'm living in a fantasy up here and not paying attention to reality. My dad wants me to get a job. Mac wants me to get a part job with him in Utah. I don't even want to get a job. I want to get a faster internet connection so i can make skins like Angie does and sell them on www.secondlife.com and sell them for lindens (their currency) and then turn lindens into real money. Angie has made over $15,000 in one year on secondlife. I could too but i need to pay full attention to Angie and SL so that Angie can teach me. Also i know my parents wouldn't even let me go to Utah alone. They don't trust me. They think i'll go and have sex there. >.<
I love Mac and we both promised that we weren't going to do anything till we were 18. I kind of wish i was 18 now though that way i could run away and not get in trouble for it. God i hope things work ut for us. I really do. T-T
Any way, Here are some pictures of Mac. And one of his Mom:
Mac in August
Mac in September with gelled hair X3
Mac in October, He bleached his hair so he could look like Vash for Halloween X3
Mac in November or December, he shaved his hair cause his hair was all stiff feeling i guess. x3
And this is my baby's mommy. :) See? Isn't she pretty? She looks like a cool mom. :)
Well that's all. I'm gonna go drool in a corner X3
~Peace (\/)(~.^) |
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| I'M BACK I SWEAR IT >.> |
[Jan. 18th, 2007|07:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | T-T | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Cleopatra-"Right Back Where We Started From" | ] |
I need someone constantly on my ass to update this. So everyone make sure you bug me at school and stuff so i remember xD
Nothing new. Ummm i'm still with my boyfriend Mac. If i haven't already posted about him (doesn't remember), we started dating in August and yes he lives far away (in Utah) BUT, online relationships CAN work. And i really love Mac a lot so i believe it will all work out and one day we'll finally be together. He just turned 16 January 10th. So i drew him like 3 pictures of us together. If you want to see them they are on my deviantart, link is posted in the last entry. I have gotten a lot better at coloring. But not in photoshop, but in imageready, pretty sweet huh? That program is a pain in the ass because it doesn't have the dodge and burn tool. Oh and i will post some pictures of Mac.
Some other stuff that has happened recently, in september or october, i think october, i got in a car accident (i was driving) and it wasn't a real bad accident but i did end up going to court on December 7th so that i wouldn't get any point on my license or have to pay the ticket, thought we did end up paying $100 in court fees and i had to attend a driver's ed class (oh and i'm still on my permit) which costed $60. Then on December 11th i got caught talking to my friend, Dan who lives in Indiana and is 18, at 4 in the morning and we were talking about school and how his mom kicked him out of the house be cause she wanted the computer and Dan was joking around with her, so now he lives with his grandparents. Any way my aunt caught me and freaked out, called my dad, my dad told her to take my laptop away and i had to have my cell phone taken away at night. Well i got my laptop back like sometime in January, and i still get to keep my cell at night so it's all good. Though my dad said he wasn't going to renew my plan in Feb. But he might just forget and do it any way, hopefully. Also in December on the 30th i think, i got in another car accident, this time my dad was driving. We were going this way <~~~~ and the lady we hit was going this way ~~~~~~> we were to close and she decided to make a left right in front of us and we were going 45 mph and we hit her passenger side of her car and my dad's truck was totaled, the lady went to the hospital and i had a huge bruise going from my right shoulder down to my left side, from my seatbelt. Thank god i was wearing it or i would have died.
Also i am doing horrible in school. I failed two classes last term and i failed one more, maybe two this term. I hope to god it is only one. My aunt is having me take BYU, so i can make up credits online. It's cheaper. I'm home from exams too.
My classes were:
Desktop Publishing
Radio 1
Drawing 4 (because i failed it last year)
Pre Algebra (i think) or maybe just algebra
I hate school so much. Everytime i think about it and how badly i am doing in school i get so depressed. And it's hard when your parents tell you that you wont be happy unless you have a nice job and a lot of money. Well that's another thing i talked to Dan about on the phone. He told me it doesn't matter if you fail horribly at school, everything will be alright. It just matters that you are happy. And i will be. It's not like if i get out of school i will be screwed for the rest of my life. I will be ok.
And if anyone agrees with this please say so, so i'm not feeling so down.
Well that's it.
Peace
~Ash |
|
|
| I'm baaaaaaaaaccccck! |
[Oct. 16th, 2006|07:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  0.0 | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Durch Den Monsun" by Tokio Hotel | ] |
Hey sorry i haven't been on in forever! ^^;
I finally got my lap top (back in August)
So i will try to update this as much as possible like when i first started LJ.
Any way check out my deviantart to see my newest drawings and what not. I think i have gotten a little better since last year. http://vampedout.deviantart.com/
Hmmm what else?
I think that's it. Okay comment me so i know you're still alive as well! ^-^ |
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| YAY! |
[Jan. 31st, 2006|07:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | YAY! | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "7 Years and 50 Days" by Groove Coverage | ] |
(glomps Danielle) I LOVE YOU DANIELLE!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE CD AND THE ONE YOU'RE CURRENTLY MAKING ME!!!
(cries)
I'm going to soooo miss you!!!!!!!! I wish you were a junior still. It's not going to be fun on the bus without you. Lauren will bug the crap out of me! and i wont have anyone there to cratique (sp?) my drawings!
Well I don't have much to say for today. Sooooo, LEAVE SOME COMMENTS! ^_^
Peace
~Lil' Ash |
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| I'm so hated... |
[Jan. 30th, 2006|03:54 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | Woooo | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Rage!" by Chromeo | ] |
GRRRR....MY INTERNET HATES ME! Stupid dial-up parental control crap! (kicks computer). Well, anyway Sorry if i don't comment back. My perental control crap wont let me go to my own comment page so i can comment back. But as soon as i get on my dad's screenname i will comment everyone back! Just be patient.
So yesterday my baby told me about the SideKick 2! He said that i could Text message, IM and e-mail him all for free! I spent over $100 on minutes on christmas break just so i could talk to him. He says the SK2 is only $50.00 and that's it's probably a lot cheaper than the amount of money i pay for minutes in 1 month! That is soooo true! Well if anyone has one of these SK2s can you tell me if what he said is true? I mean i don't want to screw myself over buying one of these, cause' i am paying for this thing myself.
My classes for this term:
Computer Art 1
Algebra
English 10
History 1
I actually have people i know in my classes! Last year i didn't! This is great! I love this year!
My friend, Angela is going to help me make a website for mydrawings since i got a scanner for christmas. Here is a sample of one of my drawings that i drew and went over to Angela's and colored it with photoshop.
AC05 stands for Ashley Clayton 2005. Yes i am Ashley Clayton DUH! And 2005 because i did it back in 2005. Everyone always asks me what AC05 means. It's commen sense people.
Well that's about all
Peace
~Lil' Ash |
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| Back...but for how long? |
[Jan. 28th, 2006|04:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | I'm fallin' | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Savin' Me" by Nickelback | ] |
Well, i guess i'll go back to updating again. I haven't been hyper in a long time...i feel so cold, so depressed. My dad says if i don't start going to meetings, we'll have to move. He thinks the reason i am depressed is because of my mom. No, it's not that. I just use her as a reason to be depressed, I can't tell my dad the real reason. Nor can i tell any of you. I can't tell anyone which makes me more depressed. I feel like i'm on drugs i get anxious and nervous every time i wait to get online. I'm addicted to him, i need him. We hardly get to talk we live so far away. He is rarely ever online when i am. When i think of him i smile when i get a e-mail from him i'm so happy i want to scream. But, when i don't get to talk to him for long periods of time, i want to die. I know you guys have no idea who i am talking about, and i wont tell you either.
I must hide everything. I smile but i'm not truely happy only he gets to see my true smiles were i am actually happy to smile.
He knows i love him, he loves me too. But he doesn't understand how much i love him. If only he could understand.
Well i hope i didn't make anyone too depressed by this.
Leave me some comments. I miss them.
Peace
~Ash |
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|
| WOOOO |
[Oct. 26th, 2005|09:59 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  0.0 | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "All the things she said" by Tatu | ] |
Tatu
Miscellaneous
All The Things She Said
Rated 5 times
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
This is not enough
I'm in serious shit, I feel totally lost
If I'm asking for help it's only because
Being with you has opened my eyes
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?
I keep asking myself, wondering how
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
Nobody else so we can be free
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said
All the things she said
And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare - don't worry me
'Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head
Mother looking at me
Tell me what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind
Daddy looking at me
Will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line? |
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| WOOOO |
[Oct. 24th, 2005|03:26 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | XP | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "Bat Country" by Avenged Sevenfold | ] |
Answer this and send it back to me. Post it on your journal without the answers. You might be surprised with the results
y = Yes, n = No, m = Maybe
Would you? Will you?
[_] give me your number? (_ _ _) _ _ _- _ _ _ _
[_] give me your screenname? ______________
[_] kiss me?
[_] watch a movie with me?
[_] take me out to dinner?
[_] let me drive you somewhere?
[_] buy me a drink?
[_] take me home for the night?
[_] let me sleep in your bed?
[_] Sing car karaoke w/ me?
[_] re-post this for me to answer your questions?
[_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?
[_] let me make you breakfast?
[_] help me with homework?
[_] tickle me?
[_] let me tickle you?
[_] stick up for me if i was being put down?
[_] go to a strip club with me?
[_] instant message me?
[_] greet me in public?
[_] hang out with me?
[_] bring me around your friends?
D0 Y0U...
[_] think im cute?
[_] think im attractive?
[_] want to cuddle with me?
AM I...
[_] witty?
[_] handsome?
[_] funny?
[_] cool?
[_] loveable?
[_] adorable?
[_] compassionate?
[_] great to be with?
[_] attractive?
[_] mean?
HAVE Y0U EVER...
[_] wished I were there?
[_] wanted my number?
[_] had a dream about me?
[_] been distracted by me?
[_] gotten shit faced with me?
ARE Y0U...
[_] happy you know me?
[_] thinking about me?
[_] going to repost this? |
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|
| Jokes |
[Oct. 11th, 2005|03:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | XP | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "B.Y.O.B." by System of a Down | ] |
COOKIE JOKE
once upon a time there was this girl...who used to climb up this pole for a cookie...cause these boys used to say “go climb up that pole and i'll give you a cookie”...the next day she told her mom...her mom said don't do that...there trying to look at you underwear...so the next day they offered her a doughnut...she did it...the boys laughed and laughed...she told her mom...her mom said the same thing...there trying too look at your underwear. the very next day the same thing happend the boys offered her a biiiigg cookie her took it and climbed up the pole the boys laughed really hard this time...her mom said the next day "don't do that anymore!" "but mom" she said "i didn't wear underwear today"
BLONDE JOKE
A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding assisted without any experience or lessons.
She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.
Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip.
She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but slides down the side of the horse anyway.
The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.
Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup.
She is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is moments away from unconsciousness or even death when Todd, the Wall-Mart Manager, runs out to turn the horse off.
ANOTHER BLONDE JOKE
A police officer pulls over a car with a young blonde driver in it.... Cop: "Miss, this is a 65 MPH highway, why are you going so slowly?"
Blonde: "Officer, I saw a lot of signs saying 22, not 65."
Cop: "Oh miss, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you're on!" Blonde: "Oh! Stupid me! Thanks for letting me know, Ill be more careful from now on."
At this point the cop looks into the back seat of the car, where the passengers are shaking and white as ghosts. Cop: "Excuse me miss, what's wrong with your friends back there? They're shaking something awful."
Blonde: "Oh... We just got off of highway 119".
ANOTHER BLONDE JOKE
Two blondes were flying to Miami from Cleveland.
Fifteen minutes into the flight, the captain announced "One of the engines has failed and the flight will be an hour longer. But don't worry we have three engines left".
Thirty minutes later, the captain announced "One more engine has failed and the flight will be two hours longer. But don't worry we have two engines left".
An hour later the capain announced "One more engine has failed and the flight will be three hours longer. But don't worry we have one engine left".
One blonde looked at the other the other blonde and said "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day"
ANOTHER ONE
A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond are sitting in a doctors office, talking about what sex of child they are going to have.
The Brunette says "I am going to have a boy because I was on top when having sex."
The Redhead replied "I am going to have a girl because I was on the bottom while having sex."
Then the Blond says hesterically " Oh my God, I am going to have puppies."
BOYFRIEND JOKE
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. This being a big event, the girl tells her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and "do it" for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never done it before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some protection. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about protection and doing it. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many he'd like to buy; a 3-pack, a 10-pack, or a family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be very busy, it being his first time and all. That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parent's house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in." The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy still deep in prayer with his head down. Ten minutes pass and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to her boyfriend, "I had no idea you were so religious." The boy turns and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist.
HIPPIE JOKE
hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the bus at the next stop. When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you". The hippie says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and pray's to God. If you went dressed in a robe and glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are god and you could command her to have sex with you. The hippie decides this is a great idea, so on Tuesday he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough the nun showed up, while she was in the middle of praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and says. "I AM GOD" I have heard your prayers and I will answer them BUT ... first you must have sex with me. The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie agrees to this and has his way with the nun. After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts "Ha, Ha Ha I'm the hippie!!" Then the nun jumps up and shouts "Ha Ha Ha I'm the bus driver!!"
ONE SHOT
A man who just got a raise decides to buy a new scope for his rifle.
He goes to a gun shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.
The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so
good, you can see my house all the way up on that hill."
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.
"I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house," the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house.
Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets,
I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my
wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off."
The man takes another look through the scope, and says, "You know what?
I think I can do that with one shot!" |
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faye_the_night's journal
>C
My frickin skool blocked xanga, gaia, neopets, sometimes aol, AND another site i was playin but the name of it has slipped my memory at the moment! 
WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME?! IT'S LIKE SOMEBODY DOESN'T WANT ME ON THE COMPUTER!!!!!!!! 
BTW you like my new expressions? They're Ryo-ohki ^_^. So for your entertainment here is a lil animation for you.
[THE END]